Episode 13: How to Use Your Voice to Speak Your Truth, Build Your Confidence, and Empower Yourself
Harnessing Your Voice: Empowering Truth, Confidence, and Authentic Communication
Let’s face it, our voices are important!
Our voices are used to connect, communicate, and express our thoughts, feelings, ideas, and more.
Today, I am joined by Brienne Hennessy to discuss our voices and how we can use them to speak our truth, build our confidence, and empower ourselves in all areas of our lives.
Brienne is a Vocal Empowerment Guide, Corporate Trainer, and Published Writer. As a certified and licensed Speech & Voice Pathologist with 13 years of clinical experience and 40+ public speaking appearances, she guides women executives, entrepreneurs, and speakers to communicate with more purpose and presence, speak frequently without fatigue or strain and listen with alignment to their inner voice. Her mission is to elevate women's self-worth and love for their unique voices!
In this episode, we talked about:
1. Why voice wellness and protecting the voice asset is important for entrepreneurs
2. Voice confidence and authentically sharing your message
3. How loving and exploring our voices has ripple effects on our personal and business communication relationships.
What do you love about your voice?
I believe we all have choices with our voice. So if we listen back with love and compassion and kindness, like oh, that's how my voice is sounding, awesome.
Special Offer to Collab with Kiva listeners:
I offer a 2-minute voice review, an opportunity for the listener to connect with me, submit a 2 min audio/video, I review it for their voice strengths and areas to reflect on, and during a complimentary 20 min call, offer my feedback to help them feel more empowered in their voice.
Connect with Brienne:
Thank you for listening! I hope you find what you love about your voice. ❤️
Podcast Transcript:
Kiva Slade 0:01
Hello and welcome to collab with Kiva. I'm your host Kiva, Slade. From the marbled halls of the US Congress to my racing themed office chair. I've learned that there is no perfect path to the life of your dreams. My journey over the past 20 years has included being a legislative director for a member of Congress, policy director for a nonprofit, stay at home mom, homeschooling mom, jewelry biz owner, and now the owner of a service based business. Whether your journey has been a straight line, or full of zigs and zags. Join me and my guest as we share insights hope in lessons learned from our email entrepreneurship journeys. May the collaborative sharing of our stories be the tide that lifts your boat? Let's dive in. Hello, and welcome to another episode of collab with Kiva. I'm your host, Kiva Slade, and I am excited today to welcome our guests. Our guest today is Brianne Hennessy. Brianne is a vocal empowerment guide, and I'm so excited to talk more with her about that. And we've kind of joked beforehand that my voice is a little off today. So this will be a really great episode for not only me, but for each of you. So here's a bit more though about Brianne. As I shared, she's a vocal empowerment guide, a corporate trainer, and a published writer, as a certified and licensed speech and voice pathologist, with 13 years of clinical experience in 40, plus public speaking appearances. She guides women, executives, entrepreneurs, and speakers, to communicate with more purpose and presence, speak frequently without fatigue, or strain, and listen with alignment to their inner voice. Her mission is to elevate women's self worth and love for their unique voices. So welcome to the show. Brianne. I'm so excited. You're here. Oh, thank
Brienne Hennessy 2:09
you, Kiva. And your voice just flowed during that introduction. So I appreciate I was tingling inside that was beautiful.
Kiva Slade 2:16
Awesome. I love this. So Breanna and I have met and we've talked previously and may have, you know, I have, obviously I've homeschooled my kids. And they did Speech and Debate. So I was always like, this is so important about our voices. But on the flip side, as a woman, many times if I'm listening to myself, I cringe when I hear my actual voice. And I'm just like, oh my gosh, do I really sound like that? And so I know, I'm not alone in that. Okay, so part of what you do though, is you help us love our unique voices. Can we touch on that a bit more?
Brienne Hennessy 2:56
Absolutely. When we think about the way biologically that we make sound, that's a really, I think, concrete paradigm to understand about ourselves first, and then we'll talk about and what that means when we're sharing conversationally, when we're sharing our message. When we're running a business. Our voices are created through breath, the sound of the vocal folds vibrating right in our larynx, right at the middle of the neck. And that sound reverberating and amplifying and shifting through the speech mechanism. The head, the neck, the tongue, the teeth, the lips. When you're hearing me, Kiva and all the listeners today, y'all are hearing me through the air, we hear others through the air. So those sound waves are traveling through the air. When I hear me right now, as I'm talking, I hear those sound waves traveling the air circling back to my ears and sound waves traveling through the bones in my skull. Because that's two filters versus the one filter that you're hearing me through or that I'm hearing you through. That's why when we go to listen to ourselves on playback, we're only using the one filter. We're just hearing ourselves in here. So our brain goes. It's not me. I don't know who that is. And then isn't it interesting? And I think this goes into a lot of the neurology studies that we look at and psycho acoustics it's called how we perceive things that our brains are primed towards fear, worry, doubt, criticism. And so can we take that narrative and choose to release it and choose something else? I believe we all have choices with our voice. So if we listen back with love and compassion and kindness, like oh, that's how my voice is sounding awesome. What do I love about that voice? What's one feature? So even with that, before we delve in further Cuba, what is one feature you like or even various I love about your voice.
Kiva Slade 4:53
That's a very good question. Um, I think one feature I felt like my Is this warm? Like I've always felt that it's like I'm people have told me like, they feel warm or welcomed when they're speaking with me. So I feel like I do like the fact that my voice is warm. Now I remember one of my high school teachers, her voice was not very warm. And it scared me all the time even as a teenager. So I think the warmth in my voice is something that I do, like maybe slash even love about my voice. Look at
Brienne Hennessy 5:29
you. Okay, that's beautiful. When you listen back, even to that intro, that warmth comes through. So you have that element right there. And then you get to choose when you use it. And yes, we can sense those things from other people. Sometimes it's the physicality, how they're actually using their voice is not the most efficient, not the most healthy version. So it can come across very, like, I don't think I really enjoy listening to that, and it kind of scares or kind of turns people off. But there's also the component of that energetic field, and you are a warm soul already. So you in those moments are allowing that to actually shine through how your voice sounds as well. So yeah, so it's beautiful to see. So when y'all listen back, like your The introduction is a great example. And then notice how Kivas voice shifts into more of her very present leadership role, I would call it because we all have those those modes, we have mom mode and my case, give us case, we have boss mode, maybe we have all these different modes of our voice, and we want to be able to embrace them all. Because if we're criticizing them, if you said to yourself, I listened to my voice before we started, and I did not like how it sounded today. And if that thread of energy was present, the listeners would feel it. And they may not know they may not be like, doesn't scare me, like the way he was, you know, like former like teacher did or something. But it might just be off enough that they're like, You know what, I'm just gonna turn this off right now. That's how powerful it can be when those underlying narratives are coming through the actual energy of the sound y'all are hearing.
Kiva Slade 7:04
Wow. And I think that's just, that's just mind blowing for me, because I think on the surface is how we look at it. And it's just the sound of our voice and not not taking into consideration those thoughts that we had, and how that actually impacts our voice as well. So, okay, that was just a whole mic drop for me. So I want everyone to write that down. What do you love about your voice, okay, and I am known for my stickies around my computer. So I'm really good to make one with a heart and your voice so that we can learn just to love our voices, because they are so powerful. And they're all our own. They're unique. So I'll negotiate.
Brienne Hennessy 7:49
Like, it's so cool. The reason we're all unique is not because of our vocal folds here, everyone thinks, Oh, mine are shorter or longer, you know, all different length. Part of that. But the biggest thing is how our beautiful shapes on top, actually manipulate those things. So know that that is just as unique as a fingerprint. And when you own that, like that just has ripple effects when it
Kiva Slade 8:11
Oh, my goodness, that's so super awesome. Okay, so let's touch on voice wellness, okay, because I know that's important. And most of the audience are definitely entrepreneurs. And so when we're talking about voice wellness, what is that? And why is it important for us to protect our voice asset?
Brienne Hennessy 8:30
They'll can't see me right now. But I'm busy sipping my water. So I think it's one of those important things that you have to start with is what are you doing to create the optimal environment for this instrument that literally can run marathon length, distances in a day of speaking. So when we think of wellness, I come at this from both experience based from an idea of holistic wellness and from my own personal journey. And I believe our voices can create wellness in ourselves a little bit like we touched on for how we are thinking and feeling about our own voice, but also the actual instrument ourselves. So for example, Kiba was sharing that she was having a meeting having a conversation and and she thought, I have to do this recording Next, do I have enough voice left, that thought hopefully should never be part of a business owners worries entrepreneur, executive, any level, frankly, because you want to be able to lay the foundation to say, You know what, I've taken care of my voice. I know how it works. I know the days that maybe I need to do a little less I know the days I can prepare for a little bit more. And so when we think of that level of wellness that keeps you from that moment of going, I have an entire five day event. I don't even know how I'm going to get through the end of it. We don't we're not we're not here for that energy that's draining energy. So this is like the preventative side of being able to ensure that your asset in your neck is optimized so that you can do it. Be and share and speak how you want to.
Kiva Slade 10:03
I love that. Absolutely. So let's talk about projecting that voice confidence because I love what you shared earlier, we have different modes, okay? And we all know like Mambo. Mambo could sound very warm. But Malmo could also sound very frightening. And you can scare a child straight very quickly. Like he said, there's also boss mood, there's so many different modes in how we have to show up. Yeah, not always maybe feeling our most confident selves. So how is it that we utilize our voice in a way that still projects that confidence, and you know, in a way that we are, so as you say, authentic and sharing our message with those that we are talking to,
Brienne Hennessy 10:51
for me, it really comes down to accessing our divine inner voice, what I refer to as the intuition, we all have intuition born with that our souls have it, it's all there. And being able to trust that what is flowing through is the truest version of you. So if you are feeling less than competent, and in that moment, in my humble opinion, I personally don't believe in the fake it till you make it put on a sheen put on a mask, I much rather you check in with yourself. And I'll talk about two ways to do that. And that inner voice so that you can show up and be able to be in the energy that's true for you. So for example, if we think of projection, like volume, which is where most people kind of get off the wrong path, so the undoped, kind of going louder and stronger and harder zoom voice, that kind of thing. That is going to mask the energy of what's truly present. But if they're able to first check in with their breath, notice where that is that if you're trying to kind of elevate the sense of confidence, the sense of presence, the breath is going to be your best friend. Because as soon as you are feeling more grounded in your breath, you don't get that kind of a pie, maybe shortness of breath, maybe breath holding that a lot of folks do because they are trying to force something. And instead, you can really ground into the breath and allow that to kind of be an anchor. The second piece from that is in with that breath, getting quiet and asking within that inner voice by setting an intention before you go speak. That intention could be before every conversation, family, friends business, otherwise, it could be very deliberate to certain events in just the business day, or it could be at the beginning and end of your day. But I've found that by setting an intention that allows for what is meant to flow and that presence to really show up. And I think we get you you said it perfectly, kind of we think on the surface. Well, how is my poise going to be? How am I going to get up on virtual, let's say stage or otherwise? What are these kind of checkboxes of like how I'm going to look confident, fine, great to those who work on that. But we have to go deeper than that. Because that's only going to serve you so far. If you're operating up here and your nervous system is like, I got to look confident here I go, I'm going to be competent, maybe I start to speak faster, maybe I go higher my pitch, whatever iteration that is, your rear runaway train is gone. So you want to be able to have much more of an embodied presence with your voice. And in that, even if like you said, you're feeling like, not great. Like, okay, this is where I'm repeating myself. This is where I can go forth. And that's going to land and resonate. More than that, what I called dissonance, resonance and dissonance of like, wow, that person's person is really, really trying, but it's not landing for me. Yeah, yeah.
Kiva Slade 13:53
Oh my goodness that I felt like you were in my house before I turned on Zoom. I'm sorry. Fortunately, for you, listeners, you can see this but before I opened zoom today, I literally I had my feet on the floor. I was seated in my chair, My palms are up and open. And I literally I went through my deep breathing. I made sure I asked to make sure that I'm listening, that I'm hearing what is being said and that Mike's speech was actually clear and concise. And so it's so funny. It's so like I set my own intentions without realizing that I was setting intentions prior to our getting together. So I appreciate that. And I felt that before though when when I haven't done those things, and I am up in that top part in white all of a sudden sounding like Rosie Perez, like, you're like whoa slow down, knows where
Brienne Hennessy 14:56
the energy just gets scattered and unsettled. versus that grounded energy is settled. So then whatever unfolds unfolds, but you're like, sweet, I got this unlock. I'm in, in the present space of my voice and my body. And it doesn't have to just be like a Can I, I'm picturing like these masks coming on. Do you know? So this is how I should speak don't shut all over yourself. This is what we do with our voices. We want to own our own voices. And just like you did, because of that presence, like that's so palpable today, Cuba, like, we just feel that, you know, so it's, it's a beautiful exchange that you did with your Yeah, I'm
Kiva Slade 15:33
so excited, like I'm going into 2022 are very excited about absolutely love that. So, as, um, let's just say as women because I know that that's such a huge focus for you, when it comes to using our, our voices and just that elevating of our self worth. How do you help people do those things?
Brienne Hennessy 15:57
That comes a lot from my own personal journey. I believe that the core of many of the shifts that I saw happen for women, some men, but mostly women who would come into the voice clinics, I would work at, structurally everything looked typical, looked well looked okay. Functionally, there was a lot of description of my voice doesn't sound like me. I don't feel heard. When I say something I don't feel heard when I share my opinion. I don't like the sound of my voice, I hate the sound of my voice. People have chastised me judged me, etc. I have to make my voice sound a certain way in my male dominated industry, whatever the case may be. And in that, we would have to really dive in to what they were feeling around both their voice and what was happening in their life. So voice is a multifactorial phenomenon, we were just speaking about how Yes, we know illnesses can impact the voice, but so can stress. So can emotional traumas, so can just the inner critic that goes on in many women's voices, and then you put on that external pressure of how women are supposed to show up lead sound, whatever it may be, but you peel all that away, and in that is the lack of self worth. And as we spoke of, if that's present, and in the space where a loving kindness, wholeness worthiness actually resides, that's infusing everything you say. And unfortunately, I've seen that then go into some people get stomach ulcers, when they have stressors, let's say for example, other people actually get to the point, I've worked with women who have lost their voice, not forever, but like a whisper. Because the body is just in this kind of cycle, this vicious cycle of self criticism, I'm not worthy, therefore, what I say I'm going to take it out on the most susceptible instrument, especially if you're getting pushback about how you're hurt. And that was my experience, I lived a long time, not realizing that I was not connected to my worthiness. And in that, through periods of depression, anxiety, a heartbreaking divorce, lots of life change. When I reconnected to that worthiness, it was transformative, and I don't use that word lightly, because I think that's having it's 15 minutes of fame right now. Probably prior to that time, I would be speaking to people and not only not be attuned to myself, I think it's important that we know how we're feeling and speaking that out on our bodies, but people would say to me, what's your tone? I don't like that tone that you're using with me. And I remember just being a confused like, I think tone are they talking? I don't know what they're talking about. And be hurt like I just wanted to like defend more and get more sassy as it were. All of these things. And when that shifted for me that was now 20, early 2014 I haven't had one person comment about my tone. I think in that when I work with women, that's the core that I want them to feel they are capable all of us in that moment are capable of owning our self worth and feeling it and healing into that wellness component that I spoke of. That's all within
Kiva Slade 19:52
Hey, so can resonate with that I felt like you know having taking time off from my career so to speak, to raise my kids and, you know, you almost felt like your voice wasn't valued, or that what you were saying wasn't valued, because you didn't have X, Y, or Z experience, so to speak, but you did actually have them just maybe they showed up in a different way. And you still had valuable input, but it was almost as if it was dismissed in some circumstances, and you didn't feel that you could, you could share, because you weren't like, well, you're just stay at home mom, like, you know, what is it that you could possibly have to add to this conversation. And I, you know, similar to you like food therapy, you know, connecting back to who I am at my core and what and owning what I do know and who I am and things of that sort that it was like, my voice I did feel like I was trying to find it again, is literally what I remember saying to someone, like, I need to find my voice again. And, you know, and I think sometimes people would take that literally, like, what is she talking about? I can hear her, like, can she not hear herself, like I've done that what I mean? Like literally that deeper work of finding my own voice again. And, you know, the process that took place after that in through that has, as he said, I don't want to use transformative lightly either. But it was truly transformative for me because it helps me to reconnect with with myself. And you know, and I think that that's something that as women can get buried in the midst of all of the other things that we have to do, and ways that we have to show up. So I appreciate that. And that understanding that I just want everyone to take away that this is such a holistic approach to, you know, this is so much deeper, I think what you do, then our voices, so to speak, you know, it's the holistic approach to uncovering or like I say, peeling back the layers of that onion to really get to the core as to what that real issue is. And then all of the other layers that have been compounded on top of that, that have led us to this kind of like my voice or, you know, something along those lines when it's so much deeper than that. And once we tap into that, process through that deal with that, whatever that is for everybody, because it's always different. You know, where you come out on the other side? Is this. Like risen Phoenix that's like, wow, you know what, my voice actually is amazing. And it's, you know, because the whole mindset shift that has also taken place. So, um, wow, I value your work.
Brienne Hennessy 23:11
Oh, I'm so so honored for you to hear and advocate in this way for it. Because it's true. Some, many folks just don't even get a lot. I didn't think about my voice. I hear that a lot, you know, from folks to as you were speaking Kiva, because you were doing such a beautiful job of noticing what I could feel what like where it felt in for you, would you be open to doing a kind of next level exercise together to bring it all kind of full circle? Yeah, okay, let's do it. That's the beauty of this, you can do this too. I'm going to use words, kind of based on what Kiva was saying. But this is, this is the beauty of you being able to input your words that you want. So keep, I'm going to ask that you allow your eyes to close. And just tuning in to the breath, noticing and reflecting on what just flowed through you as you were speaking. And I invite you to turn your attention to the heart space. And as you breathe in the inhale picturing it filling that space 360 degrees and begin to observe what sensations are there. For example, is there a warm? Is there a tingling? Is there ease peace? No judgement to sell, just allowing what will be and now I'd like you to start to connect that to your voice. So we're going to release a first on a hum and it's just going to be a really useful like a waterfall, huh? Man, you're on time. Okay, and again. Oh, yeah, we're still going on. Now people notice if you're Yes, very, very understandable, because this is where the combining in your inner voice and your outer voice happen. And it can feel a little squirmy. And that's normal. I also make people do strange sounds totally mean. Totally normal. Hi. So try the slide again for me. Oh, beautiful. Try it again, feeling into where that sound really expands through the face out around you. Oh, there you go. infusing that resonance. Let's do one more like that. And now you're going to infuse it into the words that you spoke that related to your intention. May my words speak clearly and fully.
Kiva Slade 25:56
May my words speak clearly and fully.
Brienne Hennessy 25:59
Notice how that feels speaking it out. Beautiful. My words are worthy to be heard.
Kiva Slade 26:08
My words are worthy to be heard. Ooh,
Brienne Hennessy 26:12
that was resolute. I felt that one. Thank you.
Kiva Slade 26:19
Thank you. Yes. Okay. I really like I got a gift here.
Brienne Hennessy 26:27
Absolutely. And it's so beautiful to like, put it together. It's one thing that it is intended. And it's one thing to have the breath. But then we if we're truly going to shift the entire energetic trajectory, so that ripples out. Speak it out, speak it out, speak it into existence, because then Oh, you like the resoluteness key, but like, I could just, I would love to hear what words come to mind for you. But that's the sense that I'm getting that you're like,
Kiva Slade 26:54
yes, no, definitely. Like I was feeling like when I was breathing into it, it was that peace, that ease. But it was also that I was excitement to like a low level of vibration. Because I I still feel some of that just new energy from the New Year. And I'm like, excited about things that are happening and what I think are going to happen. So for me, it was, you know, when people joke like, Hey, you turn 50 And women just don't care anymore. You kind of like really step into your own self, because you're like, Screw what everyone else says I'm gonna do what I want. Yeah, I feel like there's some of that embracing, like, 2022 is gonna be the year that yeah, it's gonna be whatever I make it to be, you know, and it's like that kind of, you know, you don't feel is constrained by the shoulds. You know, you're like, whatever.
Brienne Hennessy 27:49
I am so excited for you to listen back to this portion. Because listen, I mean, right now you're, you will hear it. Your voice has this like, vibrancy now. It's like, openness, right? That's the willingness y'all like, I get it. It's kind of one of these things that like Kiva said, I never heard of this, what does this work? What is going on? But like when you step into your life with that, kind of like, curiosity, and openness, like, Oh, it's just so fun.
Kiva Slade 28:18
I love this, this has been a joy for me. So I want to talk about though you have a product and offering because I don't know about you guys. But that right? There was already a great offering. But I know that you have more. So can you tell people about that?
Brienne Hennessy 28:35
Yes, absolutely. Thank you. Thank you for that. And truly for those of you who are willing to take this on, I would just be so excited because I love hearing each and every voice. That's one of my superpowers to be able to hear certain aspects. Primarily, first and foremost, from the health screening standpoint, if you, for example, have been hoarse for longer than two weeks scratchy voice discomfort, you need to reach out to a professional speech voice and I can't even say my own word. Now, speech and voice pathologist reach out to me something that allows you to make sure to get on that health trajectory. Okay. The other piece of doing this is just like Cuba experience today, where can you find those strengths in your voice in your speech in how you want to show up. And so what I offer is a two minute voice review. So what that means is that when we connect, I send you instructions on submitting two minutes, you can talk about something you're passionate about, you can talk about your life, your business, whatever it is, I review it, and then we meet on a call and I go through the strengths and the feedback for your voice and folks who've done it kind of like what Kiva just experienced are just very amazed at what's already so present and possible with our voices. So I'd love to hear any of you in that capacity.
Kiva Slade 29:54
Oh my goodness. The details for that will definitely be in the show notes and I just had encourage everyone to take Bran up on that offer because I'm looking forward to hearing this episode back. Well, Jessica, because I, you guys can't see it. But I just feel like okay, I don't even need my ring light, I feel glowing right now. So I want you to have that same amazing feeling going into 2022 that I'm having just after this interaction with brands. So I want to thank you, again for just sharing your wealth of wisdom, and really helping us and myself included, understand that our voice is a part of it. But there's so much more holistically that goes into what it is that we're hearing is that in product in terms of the sound that comes out of our mouth, but I am just beyond grateful for you. And I am excited for just to your work and how you continue to help women in particular with that voice with that self worth and helping us to experience and like you said earlier to love our voices, because they're all unique, everyone just like a fingerprint. So I want everyone to go forth and just embrace the beautiful sound that is yours and yours alone. So I will share all of brands, links in the show notes so that you can definitely connect with her. Make sure you do that. Go follow her on LinkedIn and all of the things in her your two minutes so you can hear some back some amazingness on your voice reviews.
Brienne Hennessy 31:41
Thank you all so much. And remember you and your voice are worthy.
Kiva Slade 31:45
Yes, so on that note, we're going to end and I will see you all on the next episode of collab with Kiva. Take care. Thanks for tuning in to this episode of collab with Kiva. You know my heart, and it wants you to know that you are uniquely made and that your business path is unique to you. I hope that now you have some clear takeaways from this episode that have left you inspired and motivated to keep pressing forward on your unique path. Make sure you subscribe so you don't miss out on any future episodes. And of course, your reviews on Apple are greatly appreciated. If you are a small business owner and you are ready to build out your business playbook, and you're ready to document and delegate what takes place in your business so it can grow beyond you. Make sure you visit me on my website, the 516 collaborative.com and let's schedule a time to talk. I'll see everyone next time. Bye
Meet Kiva Slade - the Founder and CEO of The 516 Collaborative. With a unique background in high-power politics on Capitol Hill and sixteen years as a homeschooling mama, Kiva found her calling in the online business world as a trusted guide for entrepreneurs looking to build the business of their dreams.
Kiva's work began behind the scenes, orchestrating the back end of businesses and managing teams. But her inner data diva couldn't help but notice that small businesses needed help harnessing the power of data for growth. So she and her team set out to uncover and tidy up the data required to enable clients to grow their businesses confidently and easily.